Tuesday 21 February 2012

Smile.... DING!

That's what used to happen when I went to the dentist. I would smile and there would be a cartoon "DING!" sound and a flash of light would be reflected from my teeth. Metaphorically speaking at least. I've never minded going to the dentist. I have friends who are TERRIFIED. Me, I always wondered what the fuss was about. 

I have been going to the same dentist for nearly 25 years. I am only (only?!) 32 years old, so that is pretty much continual coverage. I have never had any real problems. I broke my front tooth when I was 6 and needed the nerve removed and then a decade of temporary caps and things on it. Once I was 17 it was properly capped. Apart from that, nothing much. I've had no fillings. No toothache. No problems with the dentist.

My dentist is Dr Lea. He is a really nice bloke. Every 6 months for nearly 25 years my appointments have typically gone like this.

Dr Lea: Hello Craig. That time again.
Me: Yep.
Dr Lea: Any problems?
Me: No, nothing.
Dr Lea: Good, good. Let's have a look then.
Me: Ahhhhhhhhhhh 
(2 mins later)
Dr Lea: Ok. Good. Those wisdom teeth are coming through at a bit of an angle, but they don't seem to be causing any problems. They are useless and if they are causing no discomfort then we can ignore them.
Me: Nope. They're fine.
Dr Lea: Great. See you in 6 months.
Me: Thank you. See you then.

We both had it down. We knew what to expect and what to say when. They was no pain and no issues. It was just a 5 minute chat with a friendly bloke who prodded about in my mouth for a short portion of the time. Great.

Until now...

I've just had my usual 6 monthly check up. I got there and was told that Dr Lea had been forced to take long term sick and had effectively retired. He has some sort of nerve problem with his hands. He's had it for years and it has been treatable. Recently the treatment has stopped working and other treatments aren't helping either. This means his hands, especially his right, shake. Not a good condition for a dentist. So he's had to stop being a dentist. Very sad. He was a great dentist. I was told that, after 25 years of the same dentist, I had a new dentist. Ok. Can't be helped. I walked in and a young woman introduced herself as my new dentist. I said hello and sat down for business as usual. I was sure she'd learn her part of the script quickly enough.

I opened my mouth and she prodded about. She finished and I waited for the "Good. See you in 6 months" line. 

New Dentist: Do you grind your teeth?
Me: No.
ND: Your lower teeth are very flat.
Me: Thank you.
ND: No. It's a sign of you grinding your teeth in your sleep. We'll have to keep an eye on that and maybe do something about it. You wake up with sore jaws yes?
Me: Nope never.
ND: Oh ok. We'll keep an eye on it.... Right, you need to brush much better too.
Me: Ok.
ND: And you have two teeth which will need fillings. Book in for a 40 minute appotinment and we will do them.
Me: Whoa. What?
ND: The back. They must give you issues. Open your mouth (I did) THIS one especially (As she said "THIS" she pressed really hard into one of my back teeth with the scrapy sharp prongy thing. No pain at all. But I could tell she was trying to prove a point with pain).
Me: No. Nothing.
ND: But they are sensitive to cold and hot foods though.
Me: No. I've never had tooth ache or pain.
ND: Ok. Book in for a 40 minute appointment to fill them. It's only £30. An extra £90 a tooth if you want a white filling. See you then.
Me (A bit shell shocked):  Ok. Bye.

I booked in for the appointment in April. I'm not sure I'm going to keep it. If it's not broke, don't fix it. I can't see how I can go from 25 years of good dental health to a bollocking and (MY FIRST) two fillings. You could say that Dr Lea was seeing how things went. But for 25 years? And to never mention anything? I don't think so. He's a good dentist. He's mentioned my wisdom teeth. And that my cap will need replacing as my gum has receded a bit. But only when/if it becomes an issue.

I don't like my new dentist. She has made me not like dentists in a 5 minute appointment. I got home and told Sharon. She pointed out that if I grinded my teeth she would know about it and would whack me one to shut up grinding my teeth. A very good point. On arriving home my opening words to Sharon actually were, "I don't like my new dentist. I hope she gets hit by a bus on the way home!" Harsh I know. I don't hope that. I don't wish anyone that. I have since downgraded it to "I hope she stubs her toe. Quite hard! But with no lasting damage." And I do. I really do.

I still haven't decided what I'm going to do about letting her hack away at my teeth though.